Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Plan Backfired

In the transition of Moderators over at Icarus' Flight to Perfection, my co-moderator, Cormac, was kind enough to post a 'going out in style' prompt for me. Okay, okay, so here's my story on the prompt...

Plan Backfired

A certain Utah Governor who took a presidential position had been receiving a lot of heat about his upcoming proposal of backing down from his position overseas.

Excitement was coursing through millions for an upcoming Superbowl party that screamed of being one of the best

An Egyptian President was surrounded by a heated debate demanding his resignation after his thirty plus year position.

News forecasts suddenly became focused on a burned piano in Biscayne Bay that had mysteriously appeared overnight with no possible explanation.

The (un-named Politian) announced his resignation and possible candidacy for U.S. President.

A group of select commercials played on Television the day of the big game with the incentive to win one million dollars.

An uprising occurred and the Egyptian President is now living in another country until things in his “home town” settle down.

Someone pipes up, claiming the piano, then someone else, then someone else. All we know is that it suddenly disappeared from the sandbar… strange?

One of these things relates to another…
One of these things was used as a cover…


Question is: Can you guess which one?

An author claimed that the piano was his, placed there for an unannounced book signing, a kid watching television decided he needed it as room decoration, and then the random man who steps forward saying “The piano belongs to me”.

Problem is: not one of the so called “claimers” could admit to how they put the fried baby grand on the sand bar.

Answer to which relates to the other: PIANO APPEARANCE and SUPERBOWL COMMERCIAL… really? You don’t believe me? Just wait… You’ll understand soon enough.

How did it get there?
Well, here goes…


My “Northern Utah” friends - see any connections yet - had decided to create one of those amazing million dollar winner commercials, problem was they had too many Chiefs and not enough Indians. Our conversation went something like this:

“I think we should have a totally awesome dog who takes out a door just for a bite of Doritos.”

“Dang it, dude, dogs are SO over-rated. I propose that we have the annoying co-worker who will rip your pants off or lick your fingers clean for a taste of Doritos.”

“Okay, here’s the deal,” I said, “as long as someone else gets the dog, I’m all for it cos, yeah, the rip your pants off, lick your finger coworker… that’s just NASTY!” I was thinking along the lines of doing a commercial for anything other than Doritos, but more along the lines of promoting book stores, *cough* Borders *cough* to hopefully gain a little more business before their big “going out of business” announcement.

Problem was, my high end friend at the *cough* bookstore, told me I was already too late and that they had already planned the announcement. There was nothing that would help… not even winning the million dollar commercial, because after all how far can a million dollars go when you are too upside down in debt?

Part 1:

In my pistation, I called an old military colleague of mine who said sure, he could have someone pick up a fried piano someone had managed to drag out to a place we call “two thousand flushes” here in Southern Utah and drop it someplace where it would get lots of attention for me.

The morning I turned on my television and saw where my found piano had landed, I knew it was time to put part two of the game plan in place… and as you will see, it still backfired in my face.

Part 2:

Online Writer friend of mine lives only a short distance from where “said” piano was found and said, “hey, I need a favor. *Cough* large bookstore going out of business hoping to promote books, can you pull a few favors for me?”

Backfire:

No television footage of the book signing happened, and *cough* large bookstore still made huge announcement and now I’m left thinking, God when I eventually finish writing my novel, I’m down to one big walk-in bookstore chain who can sell my book, DAMN YOU BORDERS! I mean, big bookstore chain!

Conclusion: PEOPLE NEED TO BUY BOOKS! Oh um… yeah, I mean that’s how the crispy fried piano ended up on the sandbar in BFE, I mean Miami. Yep, that’s it…

5 comments:

  1. Finally! A reasonable explanation. Nice job CJT.

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  2. Brillant post. Well structured, balanced, humorous and highly readable Nic.

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  3. A very good read Nic, truthful, factual, comfortable to read and extremely Enjoyable as well, ....more please.

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  4. Quirky! But I feel your pain re. demise of bookshops!!

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  5. A good one, and maybe Borders would not have wound up in the pickle that they are in, if...

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